I want my pretty little life, and I want Jesus.

When I was in high school, I will never forget when a boy told me that I was going to be the girl that grew up and lived in a house in my hometown with a white picket fence. I still remember feeling very annoyed by that statement. I am pretty sure I told him, “you will see, my life is going to be different”.

The truth is that statement is very true. I want this sweet little life, AND I want to follow Jesus. These are two very opposing thoughts that I think about quite often. It would be so nice to have a nice house, great family life, great friends, and a job that I loved. Everyone wants this. There is really nothing wrong with these things. The only problem is that when you are a follower of Jesus, these things pale in comparison to the life that He has called us to.

When you study the Bible you learn that Jesus and his followers had abundant life. They experienced joy to it’s fullest. They had community with each other, they had adventure, they had the one they loved the most with them. John 10:10 say’s  “I have come that you may have life abundantly”. The disciples of Jesus experienced life abundantly. They also experienced great sorrow and hardship.

These men knew the secret to life. In some sense they responded to Jesus as if they had the cure for cancer. If I found the cure for cancer, of course I would go to great lengths to share it with everyone I knew who was sick. Jesus and His followers went to great lengths to share this good news with everyone they could. Each of the twelve disciples was persecuted. Ten of them were martyred and one was sent into exile. Yet, somehow they knew a peace that surpasses all understanding. They were living life abundantly.

In todays society we think that we have life abundantly when we have money to go on nice vacations, or a beautiful house to hosts many people, and luxurious parties to attend every weekend. But what Jesus calls us to is SO much more. He say’s that “whoever is first will be last.”

Oh man, this is such a struggle for me. Again, I want my pretty little life, and I want to follow Jesus.  There are many times in following Jesus when we are to choose the road less traveled. We are to choose to humble ourselves as Jesus humbled himself even to death. I cannot wrap my mind around this thought. This world is telling me to look out for me, to make sure I have everything I need and then some. The only thing I know to do with these two opposing thoughts is to pray and ask Jesus to change my heart and be more like His.

Someone once told me that if you have room in your house and room in your heart than you can give more. There is no doubt that I have room in my house. I have plenty of stuff- the problem is a heart problem.

If you struggle with these two opposing thoughts will you pray this prayer with me daily? To be honest, I am nervous to even pray this because I am confident He will answer. But the more I learn about Jesus, the more I know that a life with Him will always be more satisfying that the life I have chosen.

Oh God, change our hearts. Your love is never ending. Your time is never ending. Your resources are never ending. Help me to trust you in those things and to follow you towards a life of willing sacrifice. I want to be like Jesus whose life was not taken, but given!